6

O my doppelgänger!

O my doppelgänger, I can see your anger

you wan’t me smart, but I remain candor

that has cost me heavily in all my endeavors

my contemporaries excelled, I remained in fears

you told me to be diplomatic but I didn’t change

my straightforwardness was regarded as strange

you asked me to be ambitious I remained same

neither cared for fame nor worried for name

you told me to be opportunists, biased and selfish

but I thanklessly didn’t even fulfill your wish

so, O my doppelgänger, I respect your anger

I will remain as I am, don’t try to tamper

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3

The need to learn cooking

cook1

Life teaches us many things that we keep reading even in the books too, but what a married life teaches generally varies from couples to couples. Still it is worth learning from the experiences from someone who is married as they say, ‘Marriage is like a sweet,  whether you choose to eat it or not, you will either way repent’.

Generally in a traditional society the responsibility for the household work goes to the females, which is being moderated as the society is heading towards ‘gender equality’. Women are more and more competing with men and taking up all the stuff that men once boasted of exclusively theirs. The ‘only men’ domains are perfectly barged in and successfully occupied by women. However this remained more or less a ‘one way traffic’. Men mostly never tried to attempt what was earmarked as the women’s job. So the flow didn’t happen in the reversible fashion.

One of the best examples to ponder is the art and the responsibility of cooking. As the law of inheritance mostly the daughters helped their mothers in the household work. In this process they learned cooking and continued the same even after their marriages. Even in the working couples, it is an unwritten understanding that the women will be cooking for the family after returning from the job. They do. Some manage by multitasking, some by outsourcing a bit and some by getting help from their male counterparts.

What about men? Men never owned cooking as their activity at home. However it is normal to see ‘only men’ chefs and cooks at every hotel in this world. So most of the Chefs are men but not the vice versa. Surprisingly these men after returning back to home wish to eat the food what their female counterparts cook! So, at home cooking still remained a women’s job for them and what they cook is regarded as the ‘official work’!

Notwithstanding all this, in my opinion each and every man should know cooking. In traditional old-fashioned families, boys are treated as the prince and the girls, the maid servant. So the boys are not allowed to carry out or even help in the household activities. That is the reason once they come out of the parents’ umbrella either pre-planned or abrupt, they struggle to survive.  They keep quenching their hunger with ‘ready to eat’ stuff or the ‘outside cooked’ food and somehow manage to remain alive.

Many such men see a valid and stressing point in getting married. They will get pleasure to their tongue and tummy with ‘home made food’ apart from the much awaited sexual pleasure.  And for that reason, if their female counterpart falls ill for even a day or so, their life turns like hell. The ailing wife has to forget all the pain and sickness to cook even in that condition for their royal husband raising the valid question as to who is really sick. The wife with the fever and pain or the helpless incapable husband? And if the wife has to visit her mother or the mother in law place for few days, the husband becomes sick even listening to that. Others too ask, how will he manage food? And the fairy tale continues.

So, the crux of the matter is that each and every individual, if holds a stomach should be able to survive if and only if he possesses the ability to cook.  Standing on your own feet is socially equivalent to cooking by your own hands. You may never feel left out, cornered, humiliated or frustrated after marriage or even before that, if you possess this skill. Undoubtedly, the art of cooking makes the personality shine luminously bright of its own light. No eclipses, no darkness!

0

love redifined

does this look like the love redefined

no traces of compassion one can find

it blossoms like jasmine in the night

and the day brings the normal fight

no botheration for each other is seen

no idea where counterpart have been

the roof is one but the walls dominate

love slowly paving the way for hate

no time to sit with other for a while

no intention to walk that extra mile

gadgets seem to be more fortunate

as their relation appears intimate

and our lifestyle is fully mechanized

no human needs are ever recognized

are we both overwhelmingly frantic

or this the definition of being romantic

4

her fight

worried of the foreseen consequences

withdrawn back at critical instances

scared of the probable monetary loss

always justifying the actions of boss

compromised in keeping self upfront

bearing alone the catastrophic brunt

knowing the obvious what men want

the demands are killing always haunt

but she still remains alive on this earth

wearing the crown of thorns by birth

faceless world cries for her equal rights

but its her battle and alone she fights

8

Removing ‘evil eye’

Kids are the most beautiful gift of this materialistic world. A smile on their face makes us forget all our agonies. They are our future and they become what we teach them to be. Couples without kids are the most unfortunate beings in this world. The childless couples go from temples to churches to daragahs for the fulfillment of their desire of having kids. Many of these succeed too making firm the belief of the existence of a supernatural power in this world.

Parents do anything and everything for the happiness of their kids. Many fall in the trap of pseudo-religious leaders who take the parents for a ride and poor parents let that happen. It is said that Mughal emperor Babur sacrificed his own life for the good health of his son Humayun.  King Dhritarashtra’s blind love for his son is also well known. Over and above all, the mother’s love for her kids is beyond the words.

This love is the source of various superstitions of which most are common with all the parents all over the world irrespective of their education levels. For example, black cat crossing your path will make you think twice before proceeding. Similarly, you may not initiate many things on Friday, the 13th or say ‘touchwood’ for something good to stay forever.

Our kids in their early ages were quite cranky especially during the night time. They used to get up in the middle of their sleep and start crying for no known reasons. This generally used to happen on the days when we take the kids for some outing, be it in the park or the malls etc. Even when someone visited our house to see the kids, this was noticed. We used to check for possible stomach ache or something related but never could find any reasons. Few times we were forced to take the kids to the doctors in the mid of the might but it didn’t help much either.

Fortunately my grandmother during her visit to our place noticed this and suggested us to put a black spot on a child’s forehead before taking outside. This, she told will make the child look bit of ugly and the kid will stay protected from the so-called evil powers. This, I noticed was the common practice among all our relatives and they used to religiously put a little dot of kohl on the side of a child’s forehead a negative vibe over the kid Though I was not convinced, the father inside me forced me to follow this and we saw appreciable difference.

Over and above this, she also advised us to perform an exercise for ‘removing evil eye’ from the kid by taking a pinch of salt in the fist and them moving the fist circling the kid’s head seven times and then disposing off the salt in the running tap water. This also appeared ridiculous but then parents are the breeds who do many such unscientific things for the health, happiness and well being of their kids.  And, to my surprise this worked quite effectively. People told that there are various scientific explanations for this, but for us the output mattered more than the justification and there are few things that do not in any way stifle the spirits of the concerned parents.

Note: The above write up is purely based on the experience and in no way justifies or promotes the ritual. This is just shared for readers to be aware and share their experiences.
8

all study no play

I have always studied like an obedient scholar

but none of the subjects had made life simpler

I read chemistry understanding reactions better

but my chemistry never became better with her

I studied physics too much like an avid litterateur

that in no way helped in getting physical with her

I confess I was not a history student in contrary

but that can’t affect badly my background history

though I am glad that my mathematics was bright

but that didn’t help in getting my equations right

statistics too was a cakewalk like bioinformatics

but I never commented on anyone’s vital statistics

my geography looked affected with some syndrome

so I could never find out the location of her home

for me even the economics remained unexplained

that was cause for my pockets remaining drained

I had no clue on the importance of political science

and I could never become a liar under its guiadance

the study of engineering too was out of the race

as i could never really enginner my personal space

therefore I can very well say all study and no play

can become the real cause of a person’s mental decay