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International Women’s Day

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They say it is International women’s day (IWD) today, on March 8. One need not wonder what about the other days? Men should also not feel insecure about knowing or celebrating the IWD or breaking their head in finding the International men day. All days are for all the creatures in this planet which rotates on its axis that causes day and night which we count for 24 hours.

Yes, this is a special day for women (and men) as it is to celebrate the success of women in their respective fields and also to applaud the new areas the women are exploring and conquering. There is effectively nothing left in this world that can be termed as ‘man only’ domain which nature has not restricted. And that brings the needle of the gender balance to the middle.

However there is another aspect of such celebrations. What is the relevance and applicability of the seminars, conferences etc. organized on this day? Who benefits? Are the people attending them are unaware of those points highlighted in the talks? There need to be much more ground celebrations on this day. Especially among the poor, the tribal and the orthodox part of the world where the women are still struggling to get their due share of respect and equality.

On this day, let each one of us carry out an introspection on this day as to how much we have contributed towards the equality of women? At least to the women whom we are living with, to our sisters, our daughters and above all, the better half? As men we may not have much say on what goes through our mother or the sister but definitely, we are responsible to what kind of treatment we give to our daughters and wife. If we correct ourselves at personal level there, things will be definitely under balance.

 As far as the official scenario is concerned, there is a lot improvement required. But if we understand our responsibility and remain true to ourselves, there will be drastic improvement. Can we imagine a scenario where:

In office as the boss, we ensure that the women subordinates are treated equally without any prejudice.

  • In public places we keep our eye focus on the women same way as we do it for men.
  • In isolated areas we do not get the adrenaline rush pumping out seeing a lonely woman.
  • We treat our daughter –in-law equal (if not better) to our daughters
  • The police personnel nail the ‘crime against women’ culprits on war footing
  • A pregnant woman is treated as Goddess.
  • The worker class women are treated with respect and pride and not someone who can be taken for a ride, literally.
  • The cases in the court bear priority tag with lawyers pushing for speedy justice.
  • The mercy petitions for ‘crime against women’ are out rightly rejected.
  • The administrators at local and district level see that the women applicants are given their due.
  • The husbands share the household tasks equally especially the kitchen.
  • The diapers of the kids are equally changed by the fathers.
  • The fathers take care of the kids for a considerable amount of time.

This is definitely not a comprehensive list which takes care of the inherent inequality that is embedded in the system nor is the commandments for a balanced society. If anywhere we feel we fit in, let’s improve upon that area with the efforts that come directly from the bottom of the heart. That certainly will be a great tribute to the society (not women) on this IWD.

Image courtesy: Google
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#MeToo or #WhyShe ?

And finally the #MeToo revolution was triggered in our part of the world. Till now we were just following the stories from other parts of the world especially the USA and debating on them. Until one fine day one of the so-called victim stood up and shared her side of the story. The story was soon encapsulated in the searching shell of #MeToo and the much awaited trigger was finally pressed. Though there was not much of hype anticipated in this part of the world as the number of socially proven rape cases daily are far more than the number of #MeToo cases expected. In this part of the world, where every minute a Draupadi is being molested and all the Dhritarashtras and Bhishmas remain passive and mute, what value a #MeToo case can carry? Seeing the plight of women in this part of the world, these victims unanimously agree that #MeToo cases are far too less a molestation for them. That probably may be one of the reasons why #MeToo arrived so late in this part of the world. Continue reading

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her fight

worried of the foreseen consequences

withdrawn back at critical instances

scared of the probable monetary loss

always justifying the actions of boss

compromised in keeping self upfront

bearing alone the catastrophic brunt

knowing the obvious what men want

the demands are killing always haunt

but she still remains alive on this earth

wearing the crown of thorns by birth

faceless world cries for her equal rights

but its her battle and alone she fights

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O women!

you are always so very uncompromising

undeterred, uncomplaining, unconditional

unbelievable, unimaginable, unstoppable

you are the women and you are a miracle

you are, so the house has become a home

because of you the kids are brought up

you maintain balance in human lives

you are only one who never gives up

you don’t ever feel the need of a man

but a man always want you with him

you are behind the success of a man

your roles are the most powerful ones

you are the foundation stone of a family

you are called the better part traditionally

you never take any task just for granted

if you never did then you never wanted

you are the powerhouse fully equipped

O women! you are one to be worshipped

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Men-the weaker sex

I was reading on internet about various instances where a husband has given divorce to his wife just by pronouncing ‘Talaq’. And with the advent of new technology in our daily lives, the deliverance of this type of divorce also has automatically been upgraded to match the latest trends.

So, now it is the video call, the WhatsApp, the Facebook and all such tech friendly social media which is being exploited by the dominant men to show women their place! The big question is why the mindsets are not upgraded?

I always wonder, if leave the religious binding, how exactly it works? I tried telling my wife, ‘Shut up’, Shut up’, ‘Shut up’, three times, still there was not much appreciable effect. However I have noticed that when the same is from her side, even for just one time, the effect is perceptible. This is attributed immediately to woman dominating in the family. So, is there anything wrong in that?

Men literally have no moral, social and technical right to dominate in a family. The only fact that they have a different biological structure that makes them less susceptible to physical abuse and harm is being taken as the license to declare themselves superior.

The greater part of the society still follows that orthodox unethical logic and resists the change. But the real fact is that, if the social security is guaranteed, there is absolutely no need for women to be dependent on men but the vice-versa is not true. That makes men the weaker sex.

How many single fathers are successful? If we see the data, due to natural and social causes, more women were forced to stay single despite having the responsibility of raising their kids. Men immediately jump to the next boat of marriage which they do get easily, thanks to the biological and social reasons. That again proves men the weaker sex.

Most of the men are born to women (except those who indulge in rape and killings of women) and when they are young, they understand the power of a woman. They are purely dependent on their mother and respect women till the testosterone levels rise, social influences dominate and mould them into the absurd personality of a man. That is the real sign of a weaker sex.

How many men know how to change the diapers of the babies? How to bottle feed them? What is their immunization schedule? When to start the solid food? And above all how much time do men spend with their infants though being the best phase of a man’s life?

Few of my uncles have never held their kids on their lap? They limit themselves to asking the questions, where is the kid? What is she or he doing? Is everything fine? That’s it! They have never sat with their kids for talking with them, playing with them, making a project or making them do their homework.

These men think, their job is only to earn money and that is the reason why they are the head of the family. They think that they run the family and without them everything will come to a standstill. How can one call such men as fathers? They don’t understand that this limits them to mere sponsors or in most case, the ‘sperm donator’.

So, if a man gets a civilian job that requires him to stay away from family frequently or for long then better to take up farming instead. Those who feel that being busy in meetings, staying late night in office for earning money is fetching comfort to their family members and helping them leading an extravagant life, it is totally wrong. There are many things money can’t replace and one of them is togetherness. It is always the ‘family first’.

Marriage is a deemed institution with no one as the principal. Husband and wife are the faculty members and other relatives, the supporting staff. Parents raise the kids imparting the education that no external school can. I am still not able to understand how it can be closed by just a voice or a video call or a message?

Disclaimer: The views expressed are author’s personal views and are not intended to hurt the religious or social sentiments of people.
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The upbringing of a son

“Wow! Is she pregnant again?” Tina jumped with joy, “It is a great news”.

Sanjay had called Tina for a cup of tea assuring a surprise news. Hearing the introductory words made by Sanjay about the pregnancy of his wife, Tina jumped of joy. Tina and Sanjay were good childhood friends. Both were happily married and had awesome partners. But their friendship always made them share their secrets, routines and plans on regular basis. They both supplemented each other like the best of the friends to keep moving their family life in a smooth and planned manner. Continue reading

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Should a working woman marry?

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Though the question appears bit unorthodox, looking at the current socio-economic environment, its relevance cannot be undermined. Though marriage is an institution, there is no compulsion that everyone should attend it. With the quantity of divorces on the rise and the domestic crime graph touching zenith, the belief in this institution is slowly thinning. Further, the trend of live-in relationship is also on the rise which is slowly making the paper called marriage certificate, obsolete. Continue reading